TAKE ME DRUNK, I'M HOME!

*Warning: Consumtion of alcohol may cause you to wake up with breath that
could knock a buzzard off a manure truck at 100 yards

*Warning: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a jerk

*Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring
story over and over

*Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to believe that ex-lovers
are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning

*Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning
and see something really scary

*Warning: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug
burns on the forehead

*Warning: Consumption of alcohol in females may cause extreme bloating in a
9-month period