Hospital

A  woman called a local hospital.

"Hello. Could you connect me  to the person who gives information about
patients.   I'd like to find out if a patient is getting better, doing
as expected, or getting  worse.

"The voice on the other end said, "What is the  patient's name and room
number?"

"Sarah Finkel, room  302."

"I'll connect you with the nursing station."

"3-A  Nursing Station. How can I help You?"

"I'd like to know the  condition of Sarah Finkel in room 302."

"Just a moment. Let  me look at her records. Mrs. Finkel is doing very
well.  In fact, she's had two full meals, her blood pressure is fine.
She is to be taken off  the heart monitor in a couple of hours and, if
she continues this  improvement, Dr. Cohen is going to send her home
Tuesday at noon."

The woman said, "What a relief! Oh, that's  fantastic... that's
wonderful news!"

The nurse said,  "From your enthusiasm, I take it you are a close family
member or a  very close friend!"

"Neither! I'm Sarah Finkel in  302.  Nobody here tells me shit."